reassurance

they told me during the appraisal session that i was earmarked to be the team lead during the O&S phase of the project next year. i felt flattered, sure.. but at the back of my mind, i was full of fear and doubt. as i mentioned before, i felt that that i was sorely lacking in domain knowledge. can i really be effective in the position like this?

i went for mass today and during the Eucharist, i saw Han with his wife and kids. Han - my upper-study during NS. he was a regular 2nd sgt at the time, an admin supervisor by vocation. i was assigned to his office back then cos i had an IT diploma and the manpower officer wanted me to work on a special project. i guessed i had proved myself enough by that time cos they wanted me to take over him when he was leaving. imagine that - a lowly private taking over the job of a regular sergeant.

looking back at it now, i realised that this is exactly the same situation that i found myself in all those years ago. put in a position where i was technically competent, but lacking in the domain knowledge department. if i could do it then, why couldn't i do it again?

and with that, i feel much more... reassured. watever they can throw at me, i can handle it. yea...

score

score #1

got the results of my appraisal yesterday.. heard what the higher-ups thought of my performance the past year..

the glass-half-full version: i didn't do any worse than last year

the glass-half-empty version: i didn't do any better than last year either

it's a good grade. official description says "surpass expectations in most areas", i think. and since i haven't heard of anyone obtaining the elusive top grade yet, i'll just be content with wat i got for now.

project's moving into a new phase next year. and with it, comes new scope and new responsibilities.. am i ready? sigh.. somehow i feel like i'm not - still sorely lacking in the domain knowledge department. but i guess only time will tell.. let's see if i can keep this grade for next year's appraisal..


score #2

went back to the eye doctor's yesterday for a follow-up consultation. and the result of the vision test?

6/6! woohoo!

i guess the extra money you pay to get the services of a senior consultant is worth it! haha..

but towards the end, she said there was this white-ish ring around my pupils. you can't see it in the mirror, but it's pretty obvious through the machines in their clinic. "it could be nothing, but it could also be a sign of high cholesterol."

holy shit! ok, ok... so i haven't really been watching wat i've been eating lately.. and i guess this is as good a wake-up call as any. better get my act back in order. think better drag my fat ass to the doc's one day and get my cholesterol level checked out, just in case...

man, that piece of news sure puts a damper on the upcoming holiday feasting.. but the year-end holiday mood of slacking still remains! haha..

power

385W of "true power" gave out on me 2 days ago.. so it's out with the old and busted and in with the new hotness..

so here i am, back online with 450W... not with "true power"... this time with REAL POWER!

had a minor heart attack when i realised my new power supply unit came with a 24-pin connector but my motherboard's a 20-pin. the unit was supposed to come with a 24-pin to 20-pin converter, but it was nowhere to be found..

oh crap.. thought i was going to have to lug the bloody thing all the way back to the shop and demand they give me my converter.. man, i was starting to get pissed - at the manufacturer, the shop but mostly at myself for not checking whether i needed a 20-pin or a 24-pin model.

but hey, good old logical thinking won out.. checked a bit on the internet and found a photo of the the converter that was supposed to be in the box.. found out which pins they discarded when converting 24 to 20, figured out how to plug the unit in just so... and voila~ here i am!

yea, it was a pretty big gamble - could have fried my whole system, but wat the hey, i knew wat i was doing, ok. really. sorta. haha.. i guess we'll see if the computer blows up on me in the coming days.. lol